Can you feel what others around you are feeling? Are you sensitive to your surroundings? When you lay your hands on someone, do your hands know right where to go to help that person? Perhaps you are an empath. Being an empath is a double-edged sword. It can be both a curse and a blessing. On one hand, you have the ability to intuit exactly what you need to do to make someone comfortable. On the other, it is easy to lose track of what you need, because you are so accustomed to caring for other’s comfort before caring for your own. You have easy access to information about what is going on with the people around you, but sometimes it is hard to know your own mind. Some people would love to learn how to be more empathic, while others would love to learn how to retain the best parts of that skill while managing the more difficult aspects. I have this theory that people become empaths as a way to stay safe in their world. If you know what those around you are feeling, then you know how to adjust what you say and do to make them comfortable so that they are safer people to be around, both emotionally and physically. An empath cane a real chameleon, shifting tone of voice, conversation styles, body posture, and choice of tactics and actions to help the people that are around them to feel more at ease. The problem with this is that they often lose track of what is actually authentic and true for them. They tend to caretake their environment as a way to caretake themselves. This is a pretty roundabout way of doing self-care. Doing or saying something that will make someone else angry or sad is uncomfortable for an empath so that they often avoid confrontation in order to avoid feeling other people’s uncomfortable emotions. It is easy for them to lose track of the fact that they themselves are feeling uncomfortable. I know firsthand because I am an empath. It has been both a gift and has exacted many painful lessons from me. I could never be the healer I am today without having been an empath. When I lay my hands on a person, I can tell almost right away what emotions are lodged in that person’s body, what issues they are dealing with, and sometimes, even what they are thinking. On the other side of the coin, there have been times in my life where I was not true to myself because of the needs and the emotions of others, often greatly to my detriment. So what are we to do about this quandary? There are several things that I have found essential practices in my path to take advantage of the psychic gifts and lessen the problems of being an empath.
Essential Practices for EmpathsDevelop Your Shield BodyAround your physical body, there is a layer of your aura that is devoted to your interface with your environment. Its shape and condition indicate your relationship to your world. People who are empaths often have a “thin skin” in relation to their shield body. When it has holes in it, we are more easily influenced by our environment. Visualize a shield of energy around your physical body. See is as radiant and complete. You may see it as a particular colour. Some people like to see it as white or gold. Decide what colour would work well for you, and see it that way. Imagine the shield body as flowing and moving…not static we are developing a shield here…not armour. It is good for it to be flexible, so you can let in what serves you, and keep out what doesn’t.Center of being once you have the shield body in place, imagine that there is a spark in the centre of your being that is your pure essence. Focus your attention on the spark, bring all your senses to bear. Also be aware of your sensations, emotions and thoughts. First, try this when you are alone, and then, after a time, practise it around others. See if you can switch your awareness from your environment to yourself, and back again. Notice the difference between the two.Don’t Take On Responsibilities That Aren’t YoursA person can get so used to caretaking that they can feel as though they are supposed to do it. You are not. It is good to be as compassionate as possible without going beyond the limits of what you need to do to maintain your health and sanity. You are responsible up to that line, and not beyond it. If you are an empath, your idea of where the line is might be a bit fuzzy. Once you get to know where the line is, try to stick to it. It will make all your relationships clearer and cleaner get Used To Being the Bad Guy. Empaths are often outwardly kind and caring. They usually get the benefit of everyone thinking that they are almost saintly sometimes. It is easy to get attached to being the “nice guy.” It is not easy dealing with people’s negative emotions, but caretaking others does not ultimately serve them or you. It does not help them to protect them from their feelings. It keeps them from growing up. Besides, it’s not real. Must better to live in reality than a padded reality. Yes, they may get angry or sad at you or with you if you don’t do what they want you to do, but it is important to remember that their feelings are not your feelings, and your well-being is not dependent on their well being. Develop Your Throat ChakraSometimes an empath will know what they need to say or do to make good boundaries but have a hard time following through in expressing it. The throat chakra is the centre for the expression of personal truth. Through the opening of the throat chakra, we open ourselves to expressing our true needs and feelings, as well as expressing the creative force as it moves through us. Some good exercises for opening the throat chakra are singing and chanting, sharing your feelings and thoughts with friends, and meditating on the throat chakra. Some healing stones that help with the throat chakra are chrysocolla, turquoise, lapis lazuli, amazonite, and blue lace agate. You can meditate with them, put them in a medicine bag, or wear jewellery (particularly necklaces). Develop Your Root ChakraThe root chakra helps us to deal with being fully in the world. When the root chakra is open, we are fully grounded and present with whatever is coming our way. When it is not open, we can be disassociative, fearful, and have difficulty staying present with what is going on. Opening and healing the root chakra helps us to release the fears that keep us from our highest manifestation within the form. Some exercises that help to open the root chakra are: Imagine you are sending roots down into the earth from your base. Imagine you can breathe in and out of your root. On the inhale, breathe in energy from his earth. On the exhale, release anything that is within you that does not serve you. Some healing stones that might be helpful are obsidian, boji stones, hematite, and red jasper. Smudging and Clearing RegularlyWhether you are having difficulty with your empathic abilities or not, it is a good idea to smudge yourself regularly to release other people’s energy and influence from your energy body. Other good clearing methods are showering, bathing and spending time in solitude. Can you feel what others around you are feeling? Are you sensitive to your surroundings? When you lay your hands on someone, do your hands know right where to go to help that person? Perhaps you are an empath. Psychic VampiresWhen an attack takes place, the Psychic Vampire receives an energy surge while the victim experiences fatigue. People who “suck” the energy of others are called “psychic vampires.” This “sucking” takes place when one’s energy is depleted and needs to be replenished so he or she “sucks” the energy of another person. It is not unusual for a person who is ill or feeling inadequate emotionally to draw upon or deplete energized individuals of their life force. These “suckers” are not bad people, most of them are not aware on a conscious level that they are doing what they are doing. Still, their unknowing actions can play havoc with anyone who leaves an energetic opening for this type of thievery. It is important for us to beware that we may be susceptible to having our energies stolen from us and learn ways to protect ourselves.
Traits of a Psychic Vampire
•Experiences feelings of abandonment or rejection
•Needs constant reassurance
•Never feel satisfied
•Low energy – fatigued
Symptoms of Psychic Attack
•Leaky or diminishing aura
•Loss of energy
Protection against Psychic Attack
•Become aware of which individuals deplete your energy and limit your contact with them.
•Visualization Techniques: Build walls of protection or create a bubble of light surrounding your Auric field.
•Crystal Shields – amulets for protection
Cutting Cords to Toxic Relationships
Bridge Exercise / Infinity Exercise
Among healers, the sharing of energy is referred to as cording. This cord represents life support tubing energetically connecting two individuals together. Babies are born with a cord attaching them to their mothers, this is natural. But there comes a time for a mother to Cut the Apron Strings allowing her child to go out into the world on its own. This is appropriate. If the mother fails to break the cord, the child will eventually attempt to do it. This too is appropriate. The world is full of unhealthy relationships. In these relationships, individuals cling to one another allowing cord attachments to occur between them. Seldom is the sharing done equally? Actually, if the energy sharing was done equally it would be silly to have the cord in place at all. It is possible to be in a relationship without cording one another, in fact, it is preferable. Couples that share one life source ordinarily create a relationship in which one individual becomes weaker, the other stronger. The weakened person feels collapsed because of giving away his/her life source. The stronger person feels great for a time, but his/her appetite may very well increase, craving more and more of the shared energy. There are different types of situations we face in life that are difficult. Ending relationships ranks pretty high up in the “tough stuff” category. It doesn’t matter if you were the person who walked away or if someone else left you, a loss is felt either way. It is especially painful if a relationship ends without closure. Unfortunately, often times when people “breakup” what they don’t realize is that they may very well still have cords attached. The intact cord keeps an open channel for continuous feeding on each other’s emotions and anxieties. Experiencing pain from an estranged relationship or a troubled marriage? Try either the bridge visualization or infinity exercise to gently release the cord attachment to free you of continued feelings of sadness or separation.
The EmpathThe Fourth Chakra-Dominant IndividualThis is an excerpt from an upcoming book by Dr Jelusich, to be released this summer by Lotus Press Publishing